This is the page for my friend Justin who is the shit
and here are some of his poems
The Giving in to my Own Break Down
My life has taken in one bad thing after another in a weeks time,
this action has made me think of why I even am alive.
At this point of no return, my mind has taken stressed and whom
ever tries to fuck me over will feel any the pain I once felt a long
time
ago. My stress and emotion anger will lead to my break down and bring
forward
acts of death and pain to those who dared to test my limits. To this
moment, I have
broke like the glass on my car. Being involved in this hit and run,
all I think about is how
I want to rip that man's face off and piss on him. Theses unthinkable
acts I think of always comes
to a stop when my friends lack their of, always show care and love for me...to this day I still don't understand why they care so much for this hopeless fool.
Wishing to awake from a dead sleep, a cold chill softly blows against
the spinal cord with the little hairs in the small of your back moves. It is the
touch of death making it's way towards a course of action for such a man to live
or die. The madness of a single dream can haunt a man for the rest of his life.
It's called a nightmare, full of pain and anger. It is the time where the past
comes back to haunt you. The fear of awaking from a dark bloodly sheeted death
is as painful as a daylight life style. The darkness leads to madness in a crazy
man's dream. Dying the great
death is only a dream and in reality of a death is bitting off your own tongue.
A cold chilly wind blows against your bedsheets, causing your eyes to open in
shock. A fear runs in your mind that the window's are shut. You awake and get up
to the minor to only see a dark reflection behind you. A guess to be the grim
reaper and takes your soul for a reason of death. You behold a odd fact that
your body is still in bed, but your spirit is standing. A death has occurred,
you died in your sleep and right after you know your dead, a darkness appears
and all of a sudden you find yourself in hell to serve an unrestful sleep
forever. To be dead or alive is not known to me, sweetdreams and goodnight.
As I sit in my warm, dark room, I feel so alone.
I just sit here by the computer or watching T.V. being all by myself.
For my unlimited pain of being alone, I sometimes cut myself to bleed
out my anger.
The social status, which is my life is a total joke beyond any
knowledge of my soon to be friends.
I am all alone in this rude world, living day in, day out by myself,
with no one around to love me or care for me. I live everyday wondering if I
need to die, just to be one less guy.
My friends, an issue to painful to bear, by this I wish they care
enough to show me the love, that they only tell me. I sit in my chair looking
all around my room, seeing that I have everything, but in fact, I have nothing.
The life I live is a set plan by God's will, My will is to be alone without the
comfort of love. I'm told that I am cared for and loved by words and none of it
is shown to my sight, to see or know this is something of a lie. If this is my
set will by God, I don't know if I'd
want to live anymore. Without respect and love for me, makes me wonder, why even
live another day. So I can be all alone and live by such a sad will or try to
end this soul, who lives all alone. This day, I feel the need to bleed and drink
my sorrows away, I feel no need to obey the rules of life and say " Screw
God's will for me ", by doing this I shall drink and live in my total
darkness from the outside world. If I am to bleed and die, so be it, but from
now on I make my own will and that will is to bleed. The feelings of my family
and friends is really a wonder to me, by that I see a joke made of me. I felt
taken and lost, by any tears shown from me.To my friends, whom I love, you
tried, but failed in this poor man's dream. I cry inside with everyday, comes a
broken soul and a broken man. I cry in my heart and I cry even now with the
lonliness I feel. Being without friends is my will, my hell and is my pain, to
bleed must be the life I got to lead.
With
all the respect and love for my friends, I must now start to bleed.
" The Infest "
A populated
environment called earth is infested by the sick, who's only goal is to
reproduce over and over again. Like a virus that spreads all around a single
soild body. A production of new life can only cause suffocation. A place without
air is a place without life. When humans take away the infestation that plagued
our great land and killed it off one by one. The balance of civilization has
come to an end. A main factor of the infest are the youth starting families,
which causes an even larger growth to an infestation. The populated nation
causes a polluted disease of smoke and lack of breathing fresh air. This madness
must stop here and now for all time. This infest of the world spreads anymore,
suffocation is no longer a worry. With an infest, comes a challenge between
nations. A war breaks out with bombs of glory by taking large numbers of the
infestation away for good. The war, disease, killers, and pollution is a
necessary fact of life before death. The infest stops spreading of life towards
a wake of pain and no more reproduction to suffocate life of meaning. So long
and may all die in peace.
'' Alone with my Pain ''
No one can hear or see it, but it is there.
I know it is, because I can feel it all around me.
It's in my food, it's at my school, and it is in my head.
Why oh why does this bug me. My life is a player's game,
by controling every movement I make, by controling every
question I ask,
and has complete control of my mind and body. It's called my
pain, bring upon
a painful death or soon to be. My pain haunts me 24:7 and it
can't stop until I am
dead. The way people express their pain is on me. They take
hits after hits on me
and I find them more distrubed than me. Now I bet you feel my
pain.
Feel it yet?
" Why Me ? "
A man who has the worse kind of life,
tried to cut someone with a knife.
As this man prayed for hope,
instead of this he got the rope.
The people all said ''What a hopeless fool",
and all he said was " You all are cruel".
This man's neck was tied,
as he hoped to die.
To live or die in this cruel world,
he just tried to obey the rules.
His life was nothing but pain,
he just decided to die in the rain.
As they laughed at his ruin,
they just threw on the fluid.
He burned unthinkable death
as he spoke his last breath.
This man was a pilgrim farmer,
who did no one harm.
I am this man who fell,
now welcome to my hell.
(His last breath was "Why me?")
" Mid-Winter "
Winter is the time of icy ponds
and freezing lakes. With blowing
snow flying everywhere, with deep
snow on the ground. Thick snow blankets
the trees and willows. Then at last the snow
melts away and then the bright sun comes out
to play, spreading warm air, that is everywhere.
Until I believe in my fate,
I now have to begin my hate.
I always try to do my best,
but sometimes it is just left to
rest.
I’m losing it as I try to put it
all back together,
but as my life begins to shine, it
floats away like a feather.
I’m so sad, I feel like crying.
Why oh why does life screw me?
My sadness leads to madness in my
crazy little dreams.
Being alone is so cold and has
chills rolling up my spine,
while being a man with so much love
gets a little crazy.
I feel so much pain, I feel like
fighting.
As I go on day in, day out, I start
tightening in heart or in soul.
I feel a need of silence.
As for my reflecting, I realize
I’ve lost my true love.
Pain inside my gentle heartbreaks
through to the harmful reality.
Rage start with blood as it’s
red, like the rose I’d give to my beloved.
Reality sets in, as I awake the
truth of it all, I have hate for the word love.
True love is but a lie, while my
mind tries to figure this fact to be a lie or fate.
I think of her still, but my
heartbreaks piece by piece as I remember every smile she gave me,
every touch on my cheek, and with
every I love you that was told.
Love is a hallow word told to give
faith and respect.
Love is my hate, love is my pain.
The word love should begin with the
word rage.
Love is painted with the color red
for the heart and roses, as it feels to be the color of blood and rage.
To break off one’s love is to
make the other’s love lose its faith.
I’ve lost my faith in the word
love, It’s meaningless for me, but is this love or rage?
So for the reflection that has
been seen of my feelings, don’t love me.
As I walk around each day, I begin
to have thoughts of pain.
To start off every morning the same
way, as I look outside, I pray it doesn’t rain.
The rain leads to my pain of
darkness it brings, which each day ends the same way as my nightmare begins.
Being without a partner who loves
and cares is so freaking rare.
My dark days are hell as I always
felt.
God says this is my fate, while
I’m always feeling jaded, as I wish to flea my unholy meaning of life.
As I sit and reflect upon my lonely
thoughts, I start to believe that this whole mess was my fault.
The pain I must feel as I cry
myself to sleep and then I just punch myself for being so weak.
Love is the weakness I feel with
theses thoughts of pain.
My dreams are reality, my
reality is hell.
My love for you is strong,
you bring me happiness that makes me smile with such delight.
My heart holds your love for me as a wish waiting to come true
one day
this feeling of love and respect comes forth a wake of dreams.
Waiting for the day to come where I can hold you close to my
heart so you may feel my heart beat when you’re near me.
I wait for this day where I can show you my love and have the
chance to look you in your eyes for the first time to tell you I love you, which
is true, and never ending.
You are my love and you are my passion, you’re the light of
my day, you are the one I give my heart to, with every time I tell you I love
you, you listen and respond just the same.
I hope for us to have this love, this passion, this wonderful
unspeakable feeling of perfection when we are together.